the call ...

I was expecting a call from the embryologist between noon and 3 today, so when the phone rang at 9:30 my heart stopped.

"Out of the 13 eggs retrieved, 10 were mature," she said. Okay, that sounded good. She continued, "Out of those 10, 4 are now 2-cell embryos."

I took a deep breath and asked her to clarify that only 4 of my eggs had fertilized, to which she responded, "Yes. We hope for 50% to fertilize so 4 is not far from that." I thanked her and hung up.

13...to 10...to 4. Needless to say, I'm sad and bummed. Sad. Depressed. She also didn't confirm a transfer date so we will have to wait to find out tomorrow how they are doing. I was so happy yesterday (minus the pain), and now I feel like there is no way this will work. I'm sure there are stories like this that have turned out positive but I'm not at a place where I can believe this will.

Four ... this means we will probably transfer 2 embryos on either day, since the odds of a lower quality embryo surviving the freeze and thaw process isn't great.

I want to think these embabies are strong and will grow. I want a happy ending. I did everything right ... all I want is my baby :-/