Being a mom is absolutely amazing. I feel so much love, worry, awe, fear, and so many other intense emotions daily. When I look at my daughter, I truly feel like I am supposed to be her mother. More than just a feeling of 'I created you.' It's much more complex. When I look at her, I see me, my mother, my grandmother, my husband, my husband's uncle... all of these people jump out and look me in the eye sometimes. The connection we have and the love I have for her is so surreal. I just try to enjoy every moment with her. I'm not very spiritual (though I would like to be), but I do feel more purpose in my life now that I am a mom.
She is starting to gain independence. She was born with the strength (and weight) of a two month old, so it is not surprising to me that she is starting to pull away, push up, crawl... but she is also raising her arms to be held, looking for my approval, and showing affection.
Everything in life is now second. And I don't mind a bit. Sure, I'd like time to myself that doesn't involve housework. But I never want to look back and say 'I just wish I had spent more time with her.' She's just so sweet, fun, and is teaching me how to be a better person. I wanted her for so long. Funny I didn't realize how much I needed her until she was here.
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